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How can The Four Tendencies Course change my life?

There’s no magic, one-size-fits-all answer for building a happier, healthier, more productive life. Understanding the way you respond to expectations can be the key that unlocks your ability to create healthy habits and harmonious relationships.

I developed an in-depth video course about my Four Tendencies framework to help you harness self-knowledge so you can take steps to create the life you want — in the way that’s right for you.

We can build a happy life only on the foundation of our own nature, our own interests, and our own values.

Hello and welcome. I’m Gretchen Rubin, author of four New York Times bestselling books, including The Happiness Project and The Four Tendencies.

The “Four Tendencies” is a framework I developed to help you identify your personality profile, based on how you respond to expectations. Knowing your “Tendency” reveals how to make your life better (and other people’s lives better, too).

I created this online learning course for you to help you to explore more deeply the four personality types.

In this course, you’ll learn to identify your own Tendency, and use that knowledge to gain self-insight so you can make practical changes to create the life you want. You’ll learn how to appreciate other people’s Tendencies and support them effectively, with your family, your friends, your patients, or your co-workers.

We’ll explore the interplay of the Four Tendencies in relationships—and the conflict, puzzlement, and frustration that can arise.

I created this course because over the past ten years, I’ve heard from so many people who are stuck and frustrated as they try to make changes in their life; they don’t understand why they can’t make themselves do the things they “should” be able to do.

Understanding the Four Tendencies framework will help you understand your responses to both inner and outer expectations, so you can remove judgement and craft practical applications to live a happier, more fulfilled life.

When you’ve completed this course, you’ll have specific strategies you can implement based on YOUR Tendency, not just what works for me, or someone else you know. Different strategies work for different people. This course will help you identify what works for YOU.

We can only build a happy life on the foundation of our own nature, interests, and values.

The happiest and most successful people are those who have figured out ways to harness their Tendency to their benefit, and just as important, found ways to counterbalance the limitations of their Tendency.

At the end of this course, you’ll have the tools to do this for yourself.

What people are saying about the Four Tendencies

As a Physical Therapist, it is my job to evaluate, diagnose, treat, and manage disorders of the musculoskeletal and neuromuscular systems. The Four Tendencies framework has saved me and my patients a good deal of frustration, as we can both more quickly find the path of least resistance to their success. Educating them on this framework helps them in therapy, but I also take joy in knowing they can use this information like we all should – as a tool to help us achieve our goals.”

Claudia Burns, PT, DPT

I was recently working with a 17-year-old who was trying to quit smoking cigarettes. She was trying and trying to motivate herself to stop smoking and it just wasn’t working. We took your quiz together – and she came out to be an Obliger. It totally helped us tweak her treatment plan to involve other people. It was great and made such a big difference for her.

Social worker, therapist, LCSW, San Francisco

The Four Tendencies framework has given me a great understanding of myself and allowed me to have a lot of grace in realizing that I need accountability. I kept telling myself that I should be able to do it on my own because my husband could do it. Thank you! Thank you for the research that has allowed me to recognize something in myself that I needed to see. I feel like I will have the ability to be better and do more because of your words!”

Bekah Taylor

I’ve used your Four Tendencies framework with my American and Senegalese colleagues and have been delighted to see Obligers, Questioners, Rebels, and Upholders identify themselves irrespective of cultural upbringing. The framework has been a wonderful tool for improving communication and understanding with our work. Thanks so much for creating the framework (and the podcast!). I enjoy your practical and open-hearted approach to self-improvement.”


Who is the Four Tendencies Course for?

This course is for you if you’ve ever wondered…

  • Why can other people rely on me, but I can’t rely on myself?
  • Why does it seem like I resist doing even things I WANT to do?
  • Why can’t other people accept that I find comfort and freedom in my routines?
  • Why doesn’t everyone do the things they say they are going to do like I do?
  • Why do I struggle to make decisions, often becoming overwhelmed by analysis paralysis?
  • Why can’t I make time for myself and the habits I know would make me happier and healthier?

Here’s what the program looks like

5 Weeks of Instruction

You can go through the course at your own page or space it out into 5 weeks. You will learn about your own Tendency and how to harness it, as well as how effectively deal with other Tendencies. Lessons are designed to be completed in 20 minutes per day.

14 video lessons

In 14 high-quality video lessons, you’ll learn from Gretchen about how to understand and deal with each Tendency as well as apply that information with exercises and reflection questions. Transcripts of the video lessons are also available.

17 Interviews

Gretchen spoke with people from every Tendency about how they have taken knowledge of their Tendency to create the life they want. She spoke with Dan Harris (Questioner), Melissa Hartwig (Upholder), Diane Sanfilippo (Rebel), Tiffany Dufu (Obliger), and more.

Archived Live Calls

Gretchen has hosted several “Ask Me Anything” calls. These calls have been recorded and you are able to access them and listen to Gretchen answer many excellent questions about The Four Tendencies.

Private Community

During the course you will be given access to a private community where you can connect and share what you’re learning with those who are participating in the course with you.

Lifetime Access

After the 5 weeks of instruction end, you will have lifetime access to all course and bonus material. You will be able to go back and rewatch lessons or catch up if you got behind.

How the course works

When you sign up for the course, you’ll be given a username and password to access a secure website, where you can view the course content. For five weeks, I’ll release one lesson each day from Monday through Friday. Once you have access to a lesson, you have “lifetime” access to that content.

I’ve designed the course so that each day’s lesson should take no more than twenty minutes per day. Some bonus interview videos are longer than thirty minutes, but you can watch those on the weekends or after the course ends—whenever is the right time for you. I really want you to be able easily to incorporate this learning experience into your everyday life.

Hear powerful real life examples


Melissa Hartwig

New York Times best-selling author, Whole30 CEO

Kim Scott

Author, Co-founder and CEO of Radical Candor, Inc.

Tiffany Dufu

Author, Chief Leadership Officer, Levo

Dan Harris

ABC News anchor, Author and Podcaster, 10% Happier

Diane Sanfilippo

New York Times bestselling author of Practical Paleo & The 21-Day Sugar Detox

Eleanor Rubin

Student, Gretchen’s daughter

Mike Vardy

Writer, Speaker, & Podcaster, The Productivityist

Gretchen Rubin

Gretchen Rubin is the author of several books, including the blockbuster New York Times bestsellers, The Four TendenciesBetter Than BeforeThe Happiness Project, and Happier at Home. She has an enormous readership, both in print and online, and her books have sold three million copies worldwide, in more than thirty languages.

Get Started Today

When you enroll in the course, you’ll immediately get access to 3 introductory videos so you can get started right away.

When you’ve completed this course you’ll have specific strategies you can implement based on your Tendency, not just what works for me, or someone else you know.



What you get
Five weeks of instruction
Twelve video lessons
Reflection questions and exercises
Exclusive live “Ask Gretchen Anything” calls
A community where you can connect with other people who are learning this material and want to understand themselves
Ten bonus video interviews

Interested in group pricing? Contact us now using the support form below.

Frequent Questions

Should I get my friends to join?

You’ll have access to an online community with whom to share your progress, but if you know someone who would enjoy or benefit from this course, please spread the word!

Do I need to purchase the book?

No. If you’ve already read the book, you’ll enjoy the additional information and resources this course provides. If you want to get the book after you take the course, to continue pondering the ideas, terrific, but not required.
I’ve designed the course to help people dive deeper into the concepts from The Four Tendencies, and really apply them to their life in a practical way. There’s definitely a lot of information that’s presented in the book—and there’s also additional information not found in the book. For instance, the course also includes interviews, live “Ask Me Anything” calls, and the community element. If you’ve read the book, you’ll find that some content is familiar and that some is new and will help you put the Four Tendencies to work in your life.

Do I have to have a Facebook account to join the community?

You do not need to have a Facebook account to join the community. The community is hosted in “Private Groups” on my app, Better. One group includes everyone who’s going through the course with you right now, and another group includes people of your Tendency.

What if I have questions while going through the course?

If you have a question or need help with the course website or community, you can contact the support team from the “Support” button on the member dashboard.

How do I access The Four Tendencies Course?

When you purchase The Four Tendencies Course, you will receive an email with login information. Check your email and use that username and password to log in to https://courses.gretchenrubin.com.

Still Have Questions?

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The happiest and most successful people are those who understand themselves and who harness that self-knowledge to build the lives they want.